As we receive the higher frequencies of Light and align to a greater power, source, All That Is, some are going through breakups and separations in friendships, relationships or families as mismatched energy frequencies are revealing themselves. I saw this playing out last month in a group and work with others. Endings are happening. Unhealed wounds are getting triggered.

When we evolve we shift to another level of relating. Not everyone can meet us there. If another cannot raise their vibration to meet our new frequency, or cannot meet us where we are in our painful experiences, often the connection ends. Relating requires us seeing and accepting another as the person they are….not as the person we want them to be.

Others can only give us the best they can at the level of Love, awareness, understanding and energy frequency of relating that they are at. How often do we use “mismatched energy” as an excuse to end something to protect us against certain experiences and emotions?

So Love’s healing message from the Black Rose this month is this:

A personal resurrection is taking place.

What are you prepared to give up for your own transformation?

Do we ever stop to do the deeper inner work to look at what the lessons or what these sometimes painful connections are trying to show us about ourselves?

We are in a profound process of transformation as we continue to anchor our frequencies in 5D. Our “personal resurrection” is also showing us where there is no longer a vibrational match in our relating. Our distorted patterns must be transmuted back into the Light. It’s all being pushed to the surface for transformation and purification.

Firstly, thank you to those of you who have recently connected with me and my Black Rose work and signed up for these Love Letters (blog!).

They are sacred guide maps for deeper soul work and self mastery. Many of them are a navigational instrument containing insights, healing gifts and the pearls of great price and diamond wisdom that I discovered through my own life experiences and healing journey.

If something does not resonate with you let it go. I know and trust on every level of my being that the Black Rose can only deliver a message to those that are a vibrational match to receive the message and are ready to do the deeper inner work with the Black Rose. Nothing personal, that’s the way it is.

The Black Rose is not for those who are not prepared to dive deep. If you are looking for something “Rosy or fluffy” then the Black Rose will not be an energetic fit.

The Black Rose did not come into my life as a redeemer…..she came as a fearless revealer. This is the invitation I offer to those who would like to work with me or join our community of “Roses” who are committed to create change and be the change through self awareness and service to humanity.

Anyone who is serious about doing the deeper inner work to gain insight, awareness or heal on a deeper level and become more conscious will know it requires willingness and an investment of our time, energy and risk.

This may appear to be a long post for some, for that I make no apologies. I am just bringing awareness and insights to those connections in our lives that we may overlook energetically. Perhaps now is the time where we may need to make a choice and decide, do we stay or do we go? Do we need to take action of some kind?

Energy and Consciousness

We cannot heal and release what we do not acknowledge and feel. Energetic distortions within ourselves and in our relating with others can cause conflict or pain, which often comes from a lack of self awareness and consciousness.

Energy shifts are taking place on all levels. Whether relationship, partnership, friendship, spouse, co-worker, sibling or sisterhood Circles, conflict is arising in many and we are being shown if these connections are aligning with our own vibration.

There is a lesson we can learn when we look at relating from an energetic perspective. When a connection needs to end we are being given an invitation to evolve to the next quantum level of being.

When connections end or we have outgrown them, it can be hard not to take it personally. Unhealed wounds, unacknowledged grief and limiting beliefs come to the surface. We may internalise them and question ourselves that we have done something wrong or feel inadequate or a failure as our own unhealed wounds or distorted beliefs get triggered.

ALL connections are an opportunity to HEAL or GROW

When we are not a vibrational match with someone, what the connection may be showing us is where we have work to do on ourselves.

We have an opportunity to see if we have unhealed wounds and dysfunctional patterns of relating. This can include becoming aware of our control issues, procrastination in making a decision, co-dependency, victimhood, people pleasing, care-taking, over giving, needing to be needed, lack of boundaries, or enabling that must be transformed.

Through toxic relationships or where there is not an energy match, we will be shown our distorted beliefs and energy distortions that we are unloveable, not good enough, inadequate, or that we have to keep giving. All lies that we have believed and told ourselves or have been told by others.

Energetic mismatched connections with others and painful experiences are offering us an invitation to dive deep into our subconscious and look for the truth.

The Forgotten Gift

Intuition, a quality and energetic frequency of the divine feminine in both men and women, provides us with the nudges and inspiration to move us along our path to the higher realms of Love and connectedness.

Through our own personal energy signature, we instinctively know whether our connections are healthy or toxic because we feel it.

For both men and women, balance within ourselves and how we relate with others can only be re-established by awakening the “Divine Feminine” within and reconnecting to Source. It enables us to step into a more nurturing, self loving relationship with ourselves and help us find and connect with other “energetically matched” people and communities.

Divine Feminine frequency

The Divine Feminine frequency is rising and she is calling many through the symbol of the Rose and the unconditional Love of the Divine Mother. We want to seek out our “tribe” with other Roses…..

Those that feel an energetic resonance to the Sisterhood of the Rose, the Magdalene, the Essenes, or Isis to name a few, energetically are feeling the call of the Divine Feminine to take up their place in the world.

We may feel called to be a catalyst for others and take on a leadership role in service to humanity. Beloved Brothers and Sisters of the Rose….I see you. When we say yes to that calling though, something happens.

When the Divine Feminine frequency rises she also has a way of wrecking or causing havoc in our lives….

To prepare us to be a vessel for divine energy, everything within us and without that is not of Divine Love or an energetic match will come to the surface to be looked at and released.

We may feel a calling to join a sisterhood circle or gather together in a Rose community for healing….an ideal breeding ground to get caught up in group dynamics and for unhealed sisterhood wounds to get triggered.

If we are lucky enough to find one that does not use spiritual fluff or bypassing, we can come together to do our inner work, releasing the illusions and lies we tell ourselves so we can BE the change we want to see in the world.

Being in Circle or Temple brings up the toxic energies of relating for both men and women when the divine feminine wounds, sisterhood wounds, mother/father wounds, the witch wounds of persecution, envy, jealousy, competition, betrayal and many more will be exposed.

These are the old paradigm ways of relating….. Circles end not just because there is no longer a vibrational energy match. We may convince ourselves that it didn’t feel right or we don’t feel safe. Often there is an unwillingness to be truly seen for fear of rejection.

Don’t take it personally

All connections we have with others will come under the spotlight. The deeper places in our Heart and subconscious where our core wounds and distorted beliefs sit, whether they are unconscious or we have refused to acknowledge, will be exposed and revealed.

There are always consequences when we transform and shift and it has a knock on effect to those around us. It is easy to blame ourselves or others when things are not working out.

We may question what is wrong with us, or procrastinate for a long time in setting boundaries, making a decision, or taking action of some kind, particularly if the connection has been a long one. Parting ways can expose feelings of loneliness and being on our own.

When our energy vibration or values are no longer in alignment with others we have to face and deal with it if we want peace. How often have we tried to control, fix things, keep things going, or are unable to let go because of misplaced loyalty or without feeling guilty?

Where have we lacked discernment and unawareness, taking people at face value and trusting them….until they showed their true colours?

How much energy do we use and waste trying to justify ourselves to someone who cannot see or hear us, yet still stay in the relationship/friendship?

All connections involve a vibrational match, yet how often have we given others a second, third or forth chance because we think we are being empathic, believing that their toxic or unacceptable behaviour might be because they are going through a hard time, when the reality is we may fear making a decision to end the connection for fear of being alone?

When we learn to accept that there are some who will Love us, some will not, some will have an energy match with us and some will not, we no longer need to take it personally or attach to an outcome in the way we want it to be.

When we find the courage to walk away, or people drop out of our lives suddenly, sometimes in a shocking unexpected way, on a vibrational level our energy frequencies and consciousness no longer compliment each other. It is time to leave – or be left.

The Power of Honesty

The real Pilgrimage is Inward…. it is not about the other.

We do harm to ourselves when we stay in connections that do not or no longer match our vibration, or are one sided where one does all the giving and the other does all the taking.

So who will pay the ferryman for the deep betrayal and psychological harm we perceive others have inflicted upon us and we have inflicted on ourselves? And at what cost?

I have been shown all the times in my life where I knew I had to take action of some kind to end something that was so out of alignment and a mismatch with my own energy and didn’t do because I was too scared of making a “wrong” decision, fearing the consequences and the unknown.

So I stayed in unhealthy, conflicting, toxic relationships and friendships that were well past their sell by date and draining my energy because of my unrecognised and unacknowledged patterns of care taking, over giving, people pleasing, enabling and co-dependency.

I had invested years of my life in relationships that were unhealthy, disappointing, and abusive. Even when it was obvious our energy frequencies did not compliment one another, it still took me a long time to walk away because of my own unhealed trauma and wounds of wanting to fix things and the “pay offs” I got for staying in them.

There have been times when I should not have been involved with someone yet fell for their manipulative ways and emotional manipulation of saying “the right things” to hook me in and take advantage of me – emotionally and financially.

Love eventually said no! The one truth we need to know is this:

If it hurts, it’s not Love or a vibrational energy match.

In those days long ago I did not have the awareness or understanding of the energy frequencies of relationships and friendships. So much time and energy I spent in pain and suffering of not being heard, not being seen or understood, not realising these connections were just a catalyst for me to release dysfunctional patterns and evolve to another level of emotional maturity.

I put up with dysfunctional relating because of the guilt and shame I carried from my own wounding, of not wanting to hurt another’s feelings, and not being aware at the time of my pattern of co-dependency.

I allowed toxic relating with others who wanted control through judgement and criticism to keep me small and diminished.

Through misplaced loyalty I stayed in mismatched vibrational frequencies and in doing so, sacrificed my own health, emotional well-being and spiritual growth.

I avoided speaking up or taking action to end relationships and friendships because it was better to have a dysfunctional relationship and an energy mismatch with someone than nothing. I hadn’t been taught what boundaries were so I had none and didn’t know how to say no.

So I hurt my feelings instead and kept the relationships and friendships alive in a dysfunctional, mismatched way that not only hurt me, but hurt others too.

I remember all the times when it was easier to stay in victimhood with my inner wounded child, to continue in my comfort zone of “it’s not fair!” because that was easier to project and blame others rather than look at my own thoughts, behaviour and reaction to things and do something to change it.

Until I learnt to Love myself, I did not realise how much I had harmed myself. I did not really understand what boundaries were as I had never been taught them.…

and how essential they are to our own health and well-being

Truth be told, my instinct told me at times something was not right and I did nothing about these destructive connections – until I ended up out of integrity, dishonouring and totally disconnecting from myself.

I remember the times when I didn’t have the awareness of my own needs and limitations because of the burdens I carried, my own and others.

Those limitations and burdens came at a great price because I was not in “right relationship” and energetic alignment within myself in mind, body, emotions and spirit.

I stayed in a job out of misplaced loyalty and worked with people in an environment that were so out of alignment with my own energy, the stress of trying to keep it all together to pay the bills ended in burnout.

Life and our health is fleeting. The price we pay is not of monetary value, but a personal price.

It took me a long time to realise and become aware of the time and energy I had wasted (and my life that I could never get back) because I was either trying to help, get approval, fix and heal others when I needed to do that for myself FIRST.

A Heavy Burden to Carry

We carry the energetic debris of our past and present relating.

With what is going on in the outer world and seeing life as we knew it fall away, we are also being given a wonderful opportunity to acknowledge what is and what is not working for us, who we want to keep in our life and those we need to release.

Whilst on one hand we are seeing and experiencing old forms of relating with others falling away, we are also seeing a new form of relating in the new paradigm where people are looking for their soul tribes that are energetically and vibrationally matched.

However, we cannot look at vibrational frequency and energy matches with others on the outside, without looking at the vibrational frequency and relationship we have with ourselves.

Energy Vampires

As part of our own self care we must look after our own energy.

An energy vampire does not take accountability as they are usually in pain and emotionally immature. They will dump their baggage onto an empath or anyone who has a listening ear and kind Heart who will just keep giving away their time and energy because “they want to help”….

They may be friends, family, co-workers or anyone we relate too who hook into us and whether intentionally or not, drain our emotional energy and leave us feeling exhausted if we have weak boundaries or unhealed wounds.

Then there are the energy vampires who think nothing of copying and plagiarizing another’s unique gift and channelled information, claiming it as their own work because of their own insecurities and lack of self worth…..

In all our connections, it is never about the other or blaming them for “what they did/are doing to us”. It all comes back to self.

Time for action

The vibrational frequency with some people becomes so out of alignment that just like being in a burning building, the heat becomes so intense we eventually have to take a leap…..

We also play a role for the other. They may have to learn independence from co-dependence. They may have to learn to be an adult rather than act from a wounded child. Whatever the lessons are, from a higher perspective both evolve to their next level of being.

I am often reminded to stay vigilant and remember, lest I forget, there is a price to pay for everything in healing and transformation.

Through the journey of illness and disease, I am so in tune with my body now that when I sense a vibrational energy mismatch I can ask myself the following:

Will this connection drain me of my own energy or resources?

Am I doing something because I want to do it or I feel I have to or “should”?

Am I doing this to meet my own needs or the needs of another?

Will I have enough energy left to meet my own needs?

Does this connection take me closer to Spirit or further away?

There is an upcoming super Moon on the 26th/27th April in the sign of Scorpio, giving us an opportunity to look in the shadows and release what is not energetically matched to our own frequency. What do we need to let go of or remove from our lives?

What are you prepared to give up for your own transformation?

If this article has resonated with you in some way, please feel free to post a comment or share with someone you think may benefit from it using the link at the top of the page.

In Love, Grace and Service,